Let me start by saying that my daughter has, so far, been an easy child. She has always been a good sleeper, she is happy to keep herself busy and is not a fussy eater.
Now for the but. Every now and then she likes to remind me of how much I should appreciate the good behavior. And today was that day. It started off with her waking up in a shitty mood. For my sanity I gave her a lollipop for breakfast (bad mommy). She then wanted to wear summer clothes to school. Once I had wrestled her into a track suit and into the car her cousin stole her lollipop and it was either her screaming for the lollipop or him screaming for the lollipop.
Fast forward to me getting home from work. There is nothing worse than somebody telling you that your child has said something hurtful and rude to someone. At that point I was happy to give her the benefit of the doubt (what does a 3yr old know about offending someone). The iPad was confiscated for the weekend and the crying began. Followed by her telling me that she will find where I hide it AND that she is going to smack me for being ugly to her. After being sent to the corner, needing to pee twice and not doing her 3 minutes punishment I was at my wits end.
EVERYTHING that I told her not to do she did. After almost impaling herself on a comb, knocking herself out on the coffee table and almost breaking my car cd player I lost it. Big time. I screamed so loud I think the neighbors heard and the look on her face broke my heart. She apologized as she does every time she does something wrong. I was trying to explain to her that you can’t do something naughty, apologise, and then do something else wrong. Then after giving her a lecture I didn’t think I would have to give til mid high school she quietly went to her bed and said her prayers. Which went something like this: ‘Please look after my mommy and daddy and (insert every family member and tv character here) and please help me be a good girl etc etc. She is now sleeping next to me, with her hand firmly attached to my ear (her security blanket) and I cant help but look at her and smile.
So what have I learnt today? Love can truly be unconditional, raising a child can be heaven and hell all at the same time and even though I sometimes feel like all I do is scream and punish I am doing what is best for my child.
Now let me go back to watching my beautiful daughter sleep…….